Found it! Here's the interclub report.....

Nottingham Interclub Sprint Regatta

Saturday 4th September

5:45 am Grope under pillow for loaded shotgun, blow away alarm clock, stub toe on blanket box, load car.
6:15 am Strap boats to car, fold Joe into space on back seat just big enough for small hamster, consult map, direct Sarah onto M1 and head forNottingham.
9:15 am Arrive to see Regatta in full swing, get chair out, sit down.

Tim has texted me to say he'll have to scratch form our K2 1000M as he's not going to get there until the afternoon so that leaves me free to take photos. (see Gallery). The Pier Point weather God is on holiday and has left the Sunshine switch in the "ON" position with the wind machine turned down to "Gentle Breeze". This is the "Weekday, no regatta" setting and everyone takes the opportunity to relax, snooze and nibble at ginger nuts.

Vets
Rest of Richmond contingent are at full tilt with what seems like the entire Greasby extended family paddling in some form or another. Mark, who is soon to be welcomed into the Greasby fold (congrats to Mark and Liz on their engagement, we'll expect the wedding in sometime...er...well, just sometime?), doubles up with Nev and they storm their 1000M Vets B heat and end up convincing winners in their final. Fab stuff with Tim Middleshurst making a guest appearance with Caroline G's husband. I manage to get one race in a K4 1000M effort with Karl, Graham and Tim driving, fastest 9 went thru to the final (we, weren't one of them) tho the other K4 combo of Tim Middlehurst, Mark, Nev and "Mr Greasby" manage to do a fourth place in the final.

Senior Men
Bit light on the senior men side as a few of the contenders for that description are battling it out at Richmond's other speciality: The Liffey. 10 crews plus some K1s going for glory in Ireland. However, Rupert, Ollie, Joe, Giles and Hungarian George doing a fantastic job with good results in the heats and some storming finishes in the 1000M K1, K2, K4 finals (with some help from Ollie) and some fine efforts in the open 200M.

The other Ollie has a dabble in the High Kneeling C2 1000M and does well for someone whose training consists of 30 mins the previous Saturday!

Senior Women
Caroline & Liz Greasby holding the fort here with Sarah J, Nettie and Kim pitching in and doing splendid stuff in various K1/K2 combinations and managing to put out two K4s with some help from the juniors!

Juniors
Busy day for them with Ollie, Eleanor, Lizzie, Gemma all doing the club proud with Lizzie winning her K1 final and Ellie (with Sarah J) winning a K2 minor final and everyone scoring points for the club

Post Race
It leaves us in 6th place at the end of the first day but as everyone wearily makes their way to the campsite Tim & I head off to Safeways to score some BBQ stuff. We're not exactly prepared having bought precisely...NOTHING...with us but as luck would have it BBQ'a are on sale and we buy three (Tim flogs one of them later) and then strip the shelves in our unstinting efforts to feed the hungry Richmond crew (35 in the end??)

Amazingly, with a bit of swearing,  we manage to construct three BBQ's then after a bit of a kerfuffle lighting the damn things we begin to cremate anything that moves. Flare ups are doused with the odd splash of lager and fingers are crossed as bits of unidentified blackened meat are dolled out to waiting paddlers. Suddenly we're down to the last sausage which Graham scoffs quickly then we settle down to some serious re-hydration.

Trev keeps up his tradition of off-loading accidental holiday purchases and we sterilise our digestive systems with some of his Lithuanian firewater. I notice, somewhat fuzzily, that he doesn't touch the stuff. Graham loves it and orders rice pudding with green goo which Tim just happens to have in his car. Joe begins to hallucinate and I begin to suspect that our 6th place might be in danger.....

Finally collapse into  tent which Tim says was bought at petrol station in France..likely story...but I sleep soundly enough.

Sunday 5th
Everyone up bright and early including Rupert and Joe who managed a somewhat uncomfortable nite squeezed into Joe's tent without sleeping bags. I don't know how they kept warm, no really I don't.

Vets 500M
We, Tim & I, line up for 500M K2 heat in glorious sunshine and we're feeling relaxed. Karl and Graham and Nev & Mark also in our heat so its a bit of a Richmond outing. The starter calls us forward to the rafts and we adopt the start position which for Vets is just a bit of frowning. The starter says "I'll start...." and unbelievably Tim's off! We're half a boat length up before the beep goes and well clear of the pack when the second beep goes.

We reverse to the start line and the starter calmly informs us that we will be: "asked to leave the start line" if we do it again. Tim raises his arm in acknowledgment and I bury my head in embarrassment. Second time of asking we all get it right and head for the finish line like out of control washing machines. We finish inches from nabbing second place from Karl & Graham in 2:08 but 2 seconds down on Nev & Mark. That's a personal best for us knocking 12 seconds off our July Nationals time! Bloody hell, this training lark really works!

We make the second final (with Nev & Graham) but finish four seconds adrift as the effects of Trev's Lithuanian Rocket fuel finally wears off. No drug testing for Vets of course as we need various stimulants, steroids and beta blockers simply to get us to the start line.

Vets 500M K4
Both Richmond crews make it through the heat with us (Me, Tim, Karl Graham) being the 9th qualifier despite coming last! The final is a blur but the boats going really well and we're within spitting distance (er...5 seconds) of the eventual winners ( a Vets A team). We're well pleased and Tim & I have achieved our goals: Knocking 10+ seconds off our 500M time and making an A final. Good stuff, mostly down to Tim and some Teutonic training.

Junior Juniors
The lightening boyz are doing really well with Killips Jack n Josh a long with Ciaran all featuring (winning!) the Hoddy K2 class and doing us proud in the Lightening 2K races.

Everyone else does extraordinarily well but are starting to look very weary towards the end of the day. Trev even manages a K2 500M with Colin tho his arm plays up so they skip the final (which they would've won surely?). Sarah squeezes in one more five hundred before we pack up and head home...which takes us 4.5 hours!....Thanks for driving Sarah:)

Well done everyone, not sure of our final placing but good fun whatever we did. Lets hope the Richmond representation at the Liffey was equally as successful over the weekend :)

Saturday 11

The Great River Race

The balcony is thronged with people eagerly awaiting the start of the Great River race where 260 boats of assorted size and sea worthiness attempt to row, paddle and limp  from Petersham Meadows (just upstream form the club) to Greenwich. That's a small matter of 22 miles...which is why I'm taking photographs while other people do the paddling.

Our craft is the 60 year old "Last of the Mohicans" vintage C8 that's been "restored" over the last couple of years as we aim to be regular competitors in the race. So, unsurprisingly for a C8, it's 8 paddlers (and one pasenger):

•  Richard "Henno" Hendron
•  Marky "P" Pearce
•  Tim "Lord" Joiner
•  Rupert "The Elk" Elkington Blythe-Smith Forringforth
•  Charmie...just Charmie
•  Ed.."we're not going far are we?"..junior type person
•  Sean "it'll a breeze" Martin
•  Peter "Ahab" Hutchison

....and, our passenger, mascot and bailer for the day is Spyce (sitting behind her dad).

Spyce is sporting a splendid green top hat and is wearing her lucky socks so I figure we've got every chance of winning! The boat is loaded and paddlers tape their favourite confectionary to the boat while Spyce sellotapes some orange smarties to the flagpole. Quick photocall at the raft then everyone's on board and heading up to the start line. The balcony stirs restlessly..

After some brief negotiations Trev agrees to drive the "press launch" and, with Lizzie acting as a counter-weight in the front,  we head off up river after the boyz. The balcony loungers are sunning themselves in preparation for the "big event" their appetite being somewhat stimulated by the three capsizes in front of the club...they can smell blood.

The river is incredibly crowded with all manner of boats manoeuvring; Dragon Boats, Whalers, Skiffs, Cutters, Viking Long Ships, Outriggers..you name it, if it could be rowed and take a passenger then it was on the river. Fantastic sight and Trev weaves and bobs amongst the chaos while I tried to get some photos. Liz bravely agreed to be the wind break and managed to protect me & camera from worst excesses of Trevor's driving...

The boyz are off and we quickly overtake some dragon boats tho' we in turn get overhauled by the outriggers. We're leaving 5th from last so the handicappers rate our chances. The boat soon gets into its stride and storms past the club where the balcony's patience is rewarded. A huge shout followed by clapping and cheering pushes the crew on and we're quickly past Richmond bridge. The safety boat frantically calls the boat over to mid river so it can go thru the centre arch perhaps not realising that the huge bow wave they were throwing up prevented the boyz from doing it! More overtaking manoeuvres take us ahead of yet more competitors and Trev has trouble keeping up with them.

We're joined by the Killips whose boat is a tad faster than the safety launch and to be fair it's not weighed down with erm...adults. We finally call it a day above Brentford and snaffle some kit-kats and fizzy drink which Trev has thoughtfully provided then head back to the club. Sadly the half lock is down and we have to use the goose poo covered rollers to haul the boat up to the river above the lock. We manage it (just) and make it back to the club...where everyone's buggered off! We dismount the engine and haul the boat into the boathouse...and I make my way home to photoshop our triumph...

Sunday 12

Meet Sue down the club (she's on  a sicknote so only gentle stuff today) and borrow Tim's "loan" skinny boat. Its suspiciously light and I'm already apprehensive as I put it in the water. My apprehension increases substantially as the boat droops and leans to the right...without me in it. Now, if you've seen me paddling my right lean is self evident and this is going to make it worse. I hop in anyway and it feels OK...which is the last thing I remember thinking as the boat rolls faster than I can say "tippy" and has me in. I take a javelin out and we wander up to the lock and back with Sue still moving smartly and me dripping disconsolately. I recover my humour enough to have some lunch at the White Cross (never, ever, have their Pheasant!) with Sue and then scoot home to have a stab at posting some pics to the website

Monday 13

Go out for a spin with Phil (another sicknote)  and we do the lock & back with me adopting a limp as I injured my shoulder clambering back onto the raft after yesterday's capsize. Phil's looking remarkably good for a man that's had Dengue Fever (could've been yellow fever?) and frankly I'm having a job keeping up. I expect all this sicknote stuff is just a front and everyone's been doing secret training...again.

Wednesday 15

" Gang of five" gathers down the Rose Of York for its first meeting. The committee consists of Tony, Alison, Mark, Tim and myself and our raison d'etre is to get the club through the re-building, refurbishment etc that is due to start in January 2005. (summary to appear on this site soon). Portacabins, contracts, flood plains and showers are discussed and we agree our Terms of Reference and reporting lines (to the club committee proper). It looks like there's going to be a lot of hard work to be got through so be prepared for some pleas regarding work parties, expert help etc...oh and free beer. We'll need that.

OK Tim's taking over the blog for a couple of weeks so here's his first contribution. His blog is marked with a "tj"

21st September tj

Arrive at club. The river is flowing 'the wrong way' i.e. fast. Very windy. Thoroughly unpleasant. Alison and a group of others are contemplating the water, none of us are keen. The 'phone goes, and it's Charmie. She has cried off, but delivers instructions for her group. 10 three minute efforts with short recovery! I tell Alison that Charmie can't make it, and with a look of delight she and all the others depart - at speed! My body rejoices at the thought of an evening off, and I get ready to go home. Hear myself saying 'well I'm up for an outing, who else is coming?' Try to get my hand over my mouth, but it's too late, and the other keenie - Sarah J has agreed to come with me in a K2. Perhaps sensing that if I was in the back of the boat I might ease off, Sarah makes me drive. The rating slipped below 98 once, and all I could hear from the back was 'up..up..up'. Slave Driver!! I thought it was a superb session, fast, powerful, stable. Sarah's comment was 'well it's useful to paddle with different people, it highlights the way one paddles oneself'. I pretended that was a compliment!

23rd September tj

The juniors are about to go out with Trevor. He has this amazing ability to make the hardest effort sound easy. 'A float to the lock and back - few pyramids, nothing too hard.' On that basis the two Tims, Ollie, Lizzie B, Brendan, Craig and Trevor embark. We were conned. The float turns out to be a heap of 1,2 and 3 minute sessions. I get my mark in early by winning the warm ups (with a head start). My excuse is that I'm paddling a more tippy boat. No one else believes me. Arms twirling, legs pumping and lungs driving compressed oxygen into the furthermost parts of my body, I sprint faster than I've gone before and accrue an impressive series of last places and refusals. I blame my sausage and mash lunch and head off for a reviving curry to repair the damage to my morale.

29th September tj

It's Wednesday, but it's getting dark, so the customary 10k has been subsumed (long word that, you can tell someone educated is writing this! ed) into an Eel Pie. The start line is packed, with the many Hasler duos testing their team spirit for the last (or in our case first) time before the race on Saturday. I'm teamed with a new partner, Karl (don't tell Isabelle about the puddings) Garvey. We push the start line (in search of clear water only you understand), and watch as three K2s and Sean Martin pull away. The rest of the field is behind us, so not too bad. Make the mistake of following Sean through the backwaters at Eel Pie - note to self, just cos Sean can get through a gap in a white water boat does not mean that a K2 can also fit!! Coming to the final stretch we're sitting comfortably on some washes, but the strain is telling, and with no one close behind we sit back and settle for 5th.